I am joining the 'Tie A Yellow Ribbon' brigade. I feel for the family because my maternal grandmother succumbed to Colon cancer March of 2003. Battling the Big C is not an easy task, not an eventful journey and was a tedious thing both for the patient and the family.
I always thought of my 'Nanay' whenever I hear a news about our former President. I was never the ideal granddaughter to her during those times. I know that 'Nanay' knows that I am not into staying at the hospital. It was always Mama and Ate that are by her side those times. I went to her twice all throughout the hospitalization, but deep inside me, I was broken. For I cannot bear to see her then suffering. I cannot bear to hear her mumbling because of pain. I cannot bear to see and feel her sufferings back then.
I was doing a theater show for the Lenten Season when I received a text message that she passed away. I was torn between being a professional and being a granddaughter. And what hurts me most was when I was told that I was the last person that she asked for on her deathbed. She was looking and asking for me before she died. She wants me to be there. She asked for me, but I wasn't there. I was never there.
All of these memories came rushing through me whenever I hear something about someone who's suffering from illnesses such as the former President's. I feel for Kris Aquino when she said on national TV that she wants to be beside her mother during these moments. I feel for everyone who was never beside their loved ones during those times that their presence was badly needed. I feel for everybody who was torn between pretending to be tough and letting their emotions show during their trial times.
If only I can turn back time, but I cannot.
I always thought of my 'Nanay' whenever I hear a news about our former President. I was never the ideal granddaughter to her during those times. I know that 'Nanay' knows that I am not into staying at the hospital. It was always Mama and Ate that are by her side those times. I went to her twice all throughout the hospitalization, but deep inside me, I was broken. For I cannot bear to see her then suffering. I cannot bear to hear her mumbling because of pain. I cannot bear to see and feel her sufferings back then.
I was doing a theater show for the Lenten Season when I received a text message that she passed away. I was torn between being a professional and being a granddaughter. And what hurts me most was when I was told that I was the last person that she asked for on her deathbed. She was looking and asking for me before she died. She wants me to be there. She asked for me, but I wasn't there. I was never there.
All of these memories came rushing through me whenever I hear something about someone who's suffering from illnesses such as the former President's. I feel for Kris Aquino when she said on national TV that she wants to be beside her mother during these moments. I feel for everyone who was never beside their loved ones during those times that their presence was badly needed. I feel for everybody who was torn between pretending to be tough and letting their emotions show during their trial times.
If only I can turn back time, but I cannot.
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