My Last Post About You

     This would be my last post about you. 

    I just want to thank you for the five years and four months of being friends. Seven months of those, you made me happy, yet uncertain, very uncertain.

Typewriters Voice

    I still believe in you despite of what happened. Behind the pain and the hurt you have caused me, I still believe that there is goodness in you. You were not born an ego maniac. I still want to know who hurt you that much to make you be the person that you are. I still want to know your deepest secret that you never told anyone, because I still care.

     But...

    I cannot be friends with you at this moment. I am wounded not just because you left me hanging. But because you will always be a reminder that I have failed as a mother, a would be mother. 

    I cannot be friends with you right now but it doesn't mean I don't want to be friends with you. Maybe soon, when the wounds of losing you and Muy are all healed, if they will heal. And when that time comes, I will no longer be affected by your presence, by your actions, by you.

   I cannot be friends with you yet. Not today, not anytime soon. I still wish you the best, the very best though. I will be leaving BayB and BIP and all other group that I joined because of you, but will still be friends with the people I come to know, people that I became friends with. You know how I am when it comes to friends.

    Regrets? You know me, I don't, I won't have any. I don't regret knowing and even falling for you. I don't regret that we did not stay being in a platonic kind of friendship. I don't regret that we've been friends with benefits. I don't regret any of those. If I will be given the chance to repeat everything, I will, but will make sure I won't get hurt when it will end, again.

     So...

    Until then. Until we meet again. Until we cross paths again. You will always be in my prayers, as well as your mom's healing. See you again when the right time comes. Until then, when it might be. Maybe not in this lifetime or next. 

    Maybe never. Maraming salamat at Maligayang Pasko, Dandoy.